Saturday, April 22, 2017
Happy Saturday, everyone! I'm on a youth retreat this weekend, so I'll be a little slow in answering comments. (and which is why I'm doing a Camp NaNo wrap up of sorts instead of an official post, because my brain cannot brain anymore.)

In past posts I've gone over the NaNo journey day by day, but as I tried to piece that together, all the days seemed the same and I couldn't differentiate one from the other. So... you're getting a mashup of them all and general rambles about the month. xD

(image headers will return in may once the nano insanity is over xD)

"So, Katie," you hypothetically ask me. "How is Camp really going? How are you really feeling about the insanity of this month?"

[insert me collapsed on the ground with dreary eyes trying to do the wording thing at twelve a.m. every night and failing] 

This month was not the greatest month for Camp NaNoWriMo, and I'm feeling quite exhausted. Like this past week -- I've been busy literally all day with school and work and other activities, and my first opportunity to write is ten at night. Which by then the last thing I want to do is try to make words come out. xD

slowly falling behind but I'M DETERMINED TO MAKE MY GOAL. and shout out to my amazing cabinmates, Athelas, Gabriela, Abi, Faith, Jeneca, Nadine, Ashley, Jaye, Tricia, Natasha, Lydia, Hannah, Stephanie, and Heidi. <3
But I've been chugging along. I have three more days of insanity and then (hopefully) I'll have some time to catch up. I'm beginning to realize that this is the new normal and I just have to learn how to deal with it. (yaaay xD)

In some ways I "enjoy" being busy. I'm an extrovert, so constantly connecting with people really awakes my mind and gives me energy. Having a full schedule motivates me to make the most out of the little free time I have, which leads to wasting less time overall.

On the other hand, all this activity still makes me worn out and it's hard to balance everything. My reading has plummeted this month and I had to return all my library books without reading them. (and received fines in the process because I keep forgetting to check the due date wHOOPS) The busyness has led to lots of stress which is never fun. -.-

One of the good things about this month was a lovely writing retreat with Nadine, Tricia, and Ashley. This was absolutely crucial to my word count and taking a nice rest in general. There were many giggles and cups of coffee and tea and pizza and laughter and word wars and pictures and happiness that weekend. <3

how we felt after conquering #10k1day
"So you talked about the month, Katie, but what about your story? How's the writing going?"

My story started off wonderfully! Now? Ehhh. I didn't plot as in depth as I should've, which has led to me feeling a little stuck. I have a vague ending to the story, but... I'm going to have to channel my inner panster for the rest of this novel. :P I already know that this novel will require lots of edits. Huzzah. xD

I do love this story, though. I love the aesthetics and the mood and the characters are slowly growing on me. It's my first time doing a prequel, and it's been fun incorporating little hints and things that will take place in Where Shadows Lie.

Because I'm slightly obsessed with aesthetics, I made one last night instead of writing. #noregrets (I'm really happy with how this one turned out and asdjkfl; I can't stop looking at ittt)

'Twas a quick little update, but thank you for reading anyways. I hope you all survive your own busy lives and that Camp NaNo is going well! EIGHT MORE DAYS. Basically a week. Don't freak out, don't freak out... [quietly freaks out]

katie grace

you ready for camp to end?
do you have any novel aesthetics?


Saturday, April 15, 2017
Today marks the halfway point for Camp NaNoWriMo. You've made it this far, so I know you have the strength to survive fifteen more days of this madness. BRING ON THE CAFFEINE.

It's 10:00pm as I write this (and now after 1:00am as I edit this). I may have completely forgotten about my blog post until now. So I decided to throw together a lil' flash fiction featuring NaNoWriMo, and use this opportunity to try out second person! So here goes nothing. It might be a little rough, but... it's NaNo. xD

You are writing.

This isn't anything new -- you are always writing. It is night. You are hunched over your dim screen, fingers flying across the keyboard, the faulty space-bar key partially handicapping your speed. There is a burning candle beside you, and it smells faintly of pine trees and oranges. There's soft music in your ears, fuzzy socks on your feet, and a giant blanket wrapped around your legs.

All of this is normal.

But what isn't normal, is your writing location. Tonight you are not typing in silence with fear that you might wake your sleeping family. No, tonight you are at a camp, and not just any camp.

You are at Camp NaNoWriMo -- where your days are spent discussing with other writers, bettering your plot, squealing over characters. There are endless amounts of food, purely for the sake of "fueling creativity." When night falls, you retreat back to your one-person cabin. You leave the window open in hope that a group of writers will pass by and you can chat with them.

But tonight no one comes. Tonight you are alone.

You resort to your characters to make up for the lack of human interaction. The words are coming along fine, but as your mind wanders around with the plot, something begins to feel amiss.

Thump, thump.

The noise is quiet at first, and you almost mistake it for the drums in your music. You choose to ignore it and keep writing. (bad decision.)

It sounds again, and louder this time. You pause the music and it continues -- thump, thump, thump. Wind slides into the cabin through the open window, and battles with the flickering candlelight. You think back to a conversation with some of your fellow campers. They spoke of terrible monsters -- NaNo beasts and creatures that will let nothing stop them.

Thud, thump, thud. 

The sound is coming from outside your door. Do you dare explore the noise? You don't have a weapon, so instead you grab the biggest book from your shelf and creep forward.

Your heart is pounding loudly, mixing with the mysterious sounds from outside. What if this is the end? What if you're just one of the unfortunate few to fall prey to this hideous beast?

You place your hand around the doorknob, gripping the book with your other. The door creaks as it opens. Your mind flashes and fantasizes with different, horrifying, possibilities: 

-- towering, snarling, murdering monster. blood dripping from fangs. razor-like claws. scratches oozing with green liquid. ready to attack, ready to capture, ready to kill --

You look out.

Nothing's there. Just the wind and the trees and the quiet tap, tap, tap of clicking keyboards.

But that can't be. You definitely heard something. You peer out, and, finally, before heading back inside, lower your gaze.

It's a bunny. 

A bunny, foot thumping on the ground.

You almost let out a laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. To think that you were making all this fuss over a little rabbit?

This bunny, however, is different. As you bend down and stare into its eyes, you realize they're red. It's teeth are a little longer and a little sharper than normal bunny's teeth would be. Before you have a chance to protest, it jumps into your cabin.

Whispers sound, and you see a crowd of campers forming.

"Oh... that poor soul."
"Never going to recover from this."
" -- Until the next one comes."
"Mid-NaNo Crisis in three, two..."
"It's the dreaded plot bunny!"

You follow the bunny into the cabin. "I don't want you!" you try to scream as it jumps into your lap. "I already have my story. I don't need you!"

But the bunny just smiles -- a seemingly evil smile for such an innocent creature -- and makes itself comfortable. Resistance is impossible. You're trapped with one of the writer's greatest enemies: the plot bunny.

Frantic, you bolt to your bookshelf, pulling out your NaNo handbook. You find "plot bunny" in the glossary. 

Definition: a story idea that refuses to go away until it is written.

You read a little farther, and to your great relief, find that there's a cure.

Cure: another plot bunny.

And so your life of a writer officially begins... and may never end.

(I know this ends rather suddenly and feels incomplete but I feel like it's applicable to a writer's life and the struggles with the ever distraction plot bunnies #writerslife)

This short story was partially inspired because a couple days ago I had my own plot bunny wander up to me. -.- I'm actually very thankful -- I had been struggling with the characters and this new plot line will help the story immensely. It will also just involve lots of rewriting. xD

Happy NaNo-ing!

katie grace

how's camp going?
are you one of those writers with endless plot bunnies?


Tuesday, April 11, 2017
[note: yes, this post is late. three days late. -.- I had it all ready to go on Friday night, but didn't have the internet to publish this until now. *sobs* It feels very odd to have this go up on a Tuesday, but... enjoy anyways! xD]

Happy eleventh day of Camp NaNoWriMo, everyone! WE'RE MORE THAN A THIRD OF THE WAY THROUGH THE MONTH! *chants* you can do it you can do it you can do it

So far my writing has been going well, which I’m stoked about. Since my mind is basically on a one-track loop around “NaNo! NaNo! NaNo!” I’m going to be talking about first draft writing today. I stalked my own blog (do people do this??) and realized that I don’t write about first drafts very often. I’ve done quite a few wrap-up posts, but they aren’t the same. So here we go – we’re talking about first drafts and allll my feelings for them. :P

(no fancy title image because of the lack of internet. AND ALSO, if I had a personal aesthetic, this picture would be it. I love the distressed white and the pop of color and the fade and chipping of the paint and squeee I could pathetically fangirl about the aesthetic of an old shed. I’ll consider that a special talent. xD)

Basically: I LOVE WRITING FIRST DRAFTS. It’s so exhilarating. There are endless possibilities and paths and characters to adore and plot twists to be written. BUT… along with those endless amounts of possibilities, there are also endless amounts of mistakes. (yaaaay) There’s that touch of fear present in the process.

Fear is an unfortunate part of life. It’s something to constantly work and strive to improve on—learning how to trust God through the struggle—but it will always be there. It’s amazing how easily fear can seep into my writing if I let it. And fear does have its place—I think it helps me look critically at my writing, strives me to do better and work harder and continue to conquer all the things—but it’s important for me to realize that this is a first draft.

It’s also important for me to realize how ridiculous a question like: what if my story isn’t good enough? is. IT’S A STUPID THOUGHT I SHOULD NEVER EVEN BE THINKING AND MUST GATHER MY TROOPS TO BANISH IT FROM MY MIND IMMEDIATELY. (to war! Attaaaaackkk!)

It shouldn’t even be a question that crosses my mind at this point, because of course my story isn’t good. It’s only a little baby right now! The plot is going to be messy. (And if you’re me, it’s very, very, very messy *shudder*) The words in the first draft aren’t going to make perfect sense for most of the time. (or all of the time. ;) 

First drafts are scary if I let them be scary. If I think about that fear of making it perfect, if wondering if this will ever be readable or if this story is “good enough,” I’m going to get bogged down. It’s inevitable, and will totally ruin that fun of writing the first draft.

Rather, I should be thinking questions like, “how can I make my story better? What can I do to improve?” So with this novel, I’m heading into Camp NaNo and writing with freedom. I love writing because I love creating and dreaming and pouring my heart onto the page. If I let the fear escape and work its way onto the page, it will start to ruin the joy of the process.

So, I’m excited about this NaNo. I’m excited about truly enjoying the story and doing my best not to think and fear about the future of it. That’s for editing and years from now. (I feel like parenting can be like an analogy to writing. [Ahem, even though I’ve never parented before.] But you have to enjoy the journey while the story is still tiny! If you focus on the fear and hardships ahead of you that’s going to ruin the adventure and process through the years.)

I’m pumped to explore characters. Explore my story. Write because I love it and it’s my passion. I can’t wait to see my characters grow and change throughout the month, live and die (AHEM), and grow friendships and fall in love and fight evil and IT’S GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN. <3

If you get stuck this month on your story, remember that you’re not the only one, and that there’s time to fix the problems later. This is a first draft, and there’s so much freedom in letting your words run free and be messy. The goal isn’t perfection—the goal is to tell the story God has placed on your heart. And that starts with many mistakes and scribbles and pushing through the disaster.

Karen Ball just posted a blog post with scripture that can help battle the writing fears. And that's a very important thing to remember -- if you hit a roadblock, you can always go to Him. He's there and has the hope that we need. (You can always shoot me an email as well and I'll be so willing to talk with you. <3)

We’ll get through this together! I wish you all the best and pray that your powerful words can come smoothly and easily.

katie grace

                How is camp nanowrimo going for you?
What’s your favorite part of the writing process?